Public Apology

[Andrew]

Look, I don't even know how to begin this.. so I'll start by saying this. 

Ive noticed when I get annoyed at someone on this game I tend to take things way overboard and it makes me come across as piece of shit. I honestly don't intend to personally harm anyone because I know what it feels like .. I'm going to expose myself a little bit here. I've told people more than enough times to "commit suicide" or "neck themselves" but honestly I assume it just comes across as banter since the roatpkz community is used to it. When I was 14 years old, I woke up to my father hanging in the garage on my birthday. And I think this disaster brings out the worst in me at times. No matter how many times I try to not say something or reply to a comment that's rude. It just triggers. What do you expect me to do when every single time I login i get pms or yells saying "oh look, it's I Downsydrome u" I'm supposed to just be friendly and go about my day? Anyways this is for the sole purpose that I just finished watching the show 13 reasons why and it shows how the things you say and little things that you do can effect a persons idea on whether they wish to continue living or not. It brought back a lot of memories and I do not want anyone to kill themselves over a stupid or ignorant comment that I've said over the last 5 years. I'm going to ask a mod to mute me so I can just be a pker, I don't want what happened to my father to happen to anybody else. 

 

And to that I seriously apologize for anything I've said. I know I've made one of these before but I'm going to do my best to keep my word on this one. We can't improve the community if nobody wants to make a change, so I'll start by trying to be a role model instead of an arrogant piece of shit. 

Thanks for reading if you did. 

Whether you're going to bash on me for making this or not, I'll just accept what people say. I'm going to try and improve. I'm sure some people know how it feels to lose a father. But having to wake up to him hanging in the garage on your 14th birthday. I don't know if anyone can ever understand how that destroys a person. I have no childhood. It was taken from me. 

 

Thanks again. 

 

 

 

 

 

[Tupac]

You're a whiney little shit in-game but I respect you for opening up about this. Sorry to hear about your father I never knew mine so while I may not know that trauma, I certainly feel the hole that you now feel.

What you've said takes some bigger balls than most people on here have. Hope to see you clean up your reputation.

 

(ps any jokes about his dad will face extreme consequence)

[Matt]

18 minutes ago, Tupac said:

You're a whiney little shit in-game but I respect you for opening up about this. Sorry to hear about your father I never knew mine so while I may not know that trauma, I certainly feel the hole that you now feel.

What you've said takes some bigger balls than most people on here have. Hope to see you clean up your reputation.

 

(ps any jokes about his dad will face extreme consequence)

I agree with Dario when I first met you, You would call me names and flame me for just pking and being myself, Glad to see your changing for the better Andrew and I'm sorry about your dad. Suicide is never the way out, Some people drink to face there problems, Some do drugs & some play roat pkz, But suicide shouldn't be an option much respect for being a real man bout it, I wish most the community seen it this way instead of being a toxic idiot. 

[Mike]

I'm sorry @I d0wn U huge respect though and you know that I am always there for you whenever you need. You're a real lad.

[ml gudi]

you know i got you in pms if you need anything andrew, but stop trying to apologize on the roat forums for you doing what everyone does in this game, pkmafia lookin ass right now, nah but real shit don't apologize for anything on here and stay you.  

[Andrew]

Yeah well, I just don't wanna have someone intentionally harm themselves over ignorant things that I say because I get flamed on roat. Going to try and yell less because the yellchat is the main cause of half the crap that I say.

[Lion Tales]

Respect man, the thing is it's hard to change the roat pkz community, but we can!

[Kihfan55]

I'm yet to deal with a traumatic experience in my life but to not feel like it was your fault must be a daily battle you go through 

I always assume you were just like me and you just wanted to see if you could get people mad, but to hear it's psychological is definitely unfortunate. I don't think it's wrong or is weird, it's just something 

This is not my place to say, but I think you definitely should see someone (if you don't already). Being easily reactive could seriously be detrimental to your future in regards to your wife/kids. If your mother or whomever you live with isn't supportive of you speaking to someone, ask other family members or if you go to college a counselor or even a professor

You probably loved your father and haven't had the appropriate goodbye.. cry nigga, talk 2 someone, it's okay to miss someone so many years later.

At some point hopefully you can separate your outward emotions and your feelings. Good luck

[JBLIND]

If you want to be muted let me know, also the best way to deal with any flame related comments that you mentioned, just be sarcastic. Look at Tupac (Dario614) and Killbob, react to the retards as sarcastic which gets them triggered. Or just pm Smackd for tips he's the most sarcastic retard on this game.  

[Tesfxye]

I swear you've done this before, without flaming roatpkz would be boring af sometimes these pussys need putting in their place 

[Hatcx]

Iv'e always been on good terms with you and whenever Iv'e talked with you you seemed like a genuine friendly dude.

Sorry about these retarded cunts who PM you mate hope they stop.

[SmokeyMontana]

dam thats wild gl bro 

[Tiger0n4oids]

Ok, I feel u man. u got the biggest balls in this game.

Edited June 2, 2017 by Tiger0n4oids

[GORILLAS]

Feel for u, that's deep af. Respect this post and ur motives

[F3 Please]

i feel for you bro, im the exact same way. i know what you mean by the banter because i do the same thing not meaning anything at all meanwhile its putting us with a huge target on our backs.

im so sorry to hear about your father, and the whole roatz community is there for you if you ever need it im sure. if not my pms are always open :-)

 

[ml gudi]

On 6/2/2017 at 2:19 AM, I d0wn U said:

Yeah well, I just don't wanna have someone intentionally harm themselves over ignorant things that I say because I get flamed on roat. Going to try and yell less because the yellchat is the main cause of half the crap that I say.

i understand your point and i do get it but if you talking about this from the dark angle of it that means you know about what it's like to be in that mind set and i completely understand but you know even being around that mind set some people will do anything for attention even actual depressed people so don't take everything you say to lightly remember it is just a game. but i do respect the fact you hit on this subject not alot of people do

[Sage fest]

Andrew, you're a decent person. It takes courage to open up and not know what to expect at times from this toxic community, you have my respect. I want you to know you can always hit me up to talk about whatever, regardless if it's the most mundane thing or not. I haven't experienced tragedy on that level, but my uncle died my other uncle is in prison. @Kihfan55 what he said about talking to someone is true even if it's not my place to say so, just releasing what you have inside of you would seem like the world was off your shoulders, hell crying is cathartic, any nigga who dares to question your manhood over it is no man himself. 

Edited June 4, 2017 by Sage fest

[Andrew]

Thanks for the support. I'm trying my best but then people like hickory comment on my posts with flame obviously.. lmao. i'm glad tupac deleted it, keeps me less tempted to reply back.