wanna rap Posted October 23, 2016 Report Share Posted October 23, 2016 My name is krystof or in roatpkz jtir hunter/seekndestroy/lonewalker . I am a 17 year old fellow roatpkz player. This is a post I made to admit I have a toxicity problem. Ahead is a bit of a "life-story". This isn't a post to ask for pity as my life is easy compared to millions that are suffering today. I made this to show that I have a problem and am apologizing for it. I guarantee you a lot of toxic players are like me, they do not personally mean anything they say but are just conflicted inside. If you do not feel like reading it I completely understand, all I want you to know is: I'm sorry. When I was young I got bullied at school . I was too young to remember that so it didn't have much of an impact at the time. so I stop going to a school when I was 14 At this school I never really figured out how to talk to people for a long while and when I finally did it was thanks to pretending to be someone I am not. Every day I would wear a fake guise to try and "please" those around me. On the inside I was dying. Around this time I had a testicular torsion. I had known about a pain in my lower regions for a while but due to my ever increasing introvertic nature I never told anyone. I became less and less fixated on my own troubles and was only worried about not bothering anyone else. This mistake would cost me as by the time a doctor examined me it was too late to fix the problem. I had to have my testicles surgically removed therefore leaving me without the ability to have children. Things like this and the bullying I got because of it led to a hole growing inside of me, yet I never removed my guise. I took to being the "class clown." People would and still do know me as energetic and cheerful. I only took to telling jokes to people to see them smile. It would give me a small sense of joy inside to see someone genuinely happy and do something I never genuinely did.... Smile. As the emptiness grew inside of me I still refused to recognize it and instead looked for another escape. I tried to play video games as another escape from reality, as many people do today. Eventually I found a game called rsps about two years ago and fell in love with it. For the first time I felt a sense of being myself. While inside this game I was free from everything bothering me and could remove my guise. After a while of playing I dreamed of becoming a professional player and tried as hard as I could to practice. I made it from noob to pro in one year and felt like I could achieve my goal if I strived harder. Sadly around this year something happened. The hole that was growing inside of me was huge. I look inside of myself today and cant figure out who I am. I lost all motivation to accomplish anything. My grades dropped, my health greatly decreased and I felt empty. Playing the game no longer felt like an escape it seemed to make things worse. I became so conflicted inside and yet vented my problems to Noone. This anger eventually would come to manifest itself in the in-game. While playing I couldn't look at my family face and recognize their humanity. I only saw words on a screen. Thus, this became where I vented my frustration. Today I look at myself and see nothing but an empty husk. I lost track of reality and the guises I take on. I have no motivation to aspire to be anything, and have lost my ability to dream. I am deeply and truly sorry for any harm I have caused to anyone. I try every day to just not type in game I try oh so very hard. I lay in bed every night staring at the ceiling saying things will be different tomorrow. But they never are. I haven't gotten any sleep for the past couple of weeks which only decreases my mental state. All of this amounts to the toxicity you see in game. If you see me in game and I say anything that insults you, know that I do not mean it. I am truly sorry to anyone I have insulted in the past and please accept my apology hug: \;_;/ this letter write by jtir mom @Yoobs @Smackd @Legend™ @Craig @Reducers @ism0kepurp @Terzey @tom @pyd omg this is so embarrassing 1 Quote Link to comment
jtir hunter Posted October 23, 2016 Report Share Posted October 23, 2016 bummmmmmmmmmmmmp' Quote Link to comment
Tanker H Posted October 23, 2016 Report Share Posted October 23, 2016 Don't be sorry, we understand brother. Just keep your head up and don't let anybody tell you your not somebody becuz you are. You should really embrace who you are and be grateful for your live. What matters is not what's on the outside but the inside; try to remember to stay positive and don't be ashamed of anything and just be yourself. Idk if that helps but that's my advice to you. I Quote Link to comment
jtir hunter Posted October 23, 2016 Report Share Posted October 23, 2016 (edited) 15 hours ago, Tanker H said: Don't be sorry, we understand brother. Just keep your head up and don't let anybody tell you your not somebody becuz you are. You should really embrace who you are and be grateful for your live. What matters is not what's on the outside but the inside; try to remember to stay positive and don't be ashamed of anything and just be yourself. Idk if that helps but that's my advice to you. I thank you for your advice i really appreciate it Edited October 23, 2016 by jtir hunter Quote Link to comment
OrbitalV2 Posted October 23, 2016 Report Share Posted October 23, 2016 Almost killed myself reading this 2 Quote Link to comment
jtir hunter Posted October 23, 2016 Report Share Posted October 23, 2016 15 hours ago, OrbitalV2 said: Almost killed myself reading this what's wrong with you please don't kill yourself i'll cry if u do that Quote Link to comment
L E G E N D Posted October 23, 2016 Report Share Posted October 23, 2016 BUMP 1 Quote Link to comment
Craig Posted October 23, 2016 Report Share Posted October 23, 2016 this is 100% cancerous Quote Link to comment
jtir hunter Posted October 23, 2016 Report Share Posted October 23, 2016 15 hours ago, Craig said: this is 100% cancerous please I'm very sorry craig I know you're really angry at me I didn't mean to do that Quote Link to comment
jtir hunter Posted October 23, 2016 Report Share Posted October 23, 2016 15 hours ago, Same Sea said: retard 15 hours ago, Same Sea said: retard 'm sorry if i ever hurt your or make you sad please forgive me Quote Link to comment
911 airplane Posted October 23, 2016 Report Share Posted October 23, 2016 lmao i did a backflip reading this why would you explain your life story to a bunch of randoms you need help my freind Quote Link to comment
Dodo Posted October 23, 2016 Report Share Posted October 23, 2016 So let's shorten this down. You lost your nuts, so you became mad at the world and started flaming ingame to try and make yourself feel better. #noballs 1 Quote Link to comment
custamcustom Posted October 23, 2016 Report Share Posted October 23, 2016 the forums clown has posted his troll apology! omfg never show me your abs n arms again on Skype then say ur gay u weird clown Quote Link to comment
Hatcx Posted October 23, 2016 Report Share Posted October 23, 2016 This letter gave me crippling depression Quote Link to comment
Estimated Posted October 23, 2016 Report Share Posted October 23, 2016 I hope u r serious. Other than that apology accepted Quote Link to comment
Hatcx Posted October 23, 2016 Report Share Posted October 23, 2016 HOLY SHIT I DIDN'T EVEN READ IT ALL THIS NIGGA HAS NO BALLS AHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAH Quote Link to comment
custamcustom Posted October 23, 2016 Report Share Posted October 23, 2016 L0L0L0L0L0L0L0L0L0L0L0L0L0L I LITERALLY GOT TO ABOUT THE 3RD OR 4TH SENTENCE SPIT MY DRINK ALL OVER MY KEYBOARD THEN CAME TO REPLY L0L0L0L0L0L 4 hours ago, Craig said: this is 100% cancerous 2 hours ago, Hatcx said: This letter gave me crippling depression 5 hours ago, OrbitalV2 said: Almost killed myself reading this L00L0L0L0L0L0 L0L0L0L 0L 0L0 L0 L0 L0 L0 L 0L 0L 0L 0L 0L 0 L0 L0 L0 L0 L0 L0 L 0L0 L0 L0 L 0L 0L 0L 0L 0L 0L 0L 0L 0L 0L 0L 0 L0L 0L 0L 0L 0L0L0L Quote Link to comment
Dr4g0nb0ys0n Posted October 23, 2016 Report Share Posted October 23, 2016 Sorry for your loss Quote Link to comment
DUn wan no shmoke Posted October 23, 2016 Report Share Posted October 23, 2016 90% of this server couldn't understand that you're trying to be sincere and give a little bit of background on yourself to the community therefore leading up to an apology for past toxicity. But, probably not a good idea to tell the server that you had to get your testicles removed. Quote Link to comment
pkmeplox1 Posted October 23, 2016 Report Share Posted October 23, 2016 lmao youre a full blown faggot Quote Link to comment
Yoobs Posted October 23, 2016 Report Share Posted October 23, 2016 Sorry for the loss of your balls Quote Link to comment
African Nher Posted October 23, 2016 Report Share Posted October 23, 2016 srsly dis nigguh has no balls l0000l 1 Quote Link to comment
MEDU$A Posted October 24, 2016 Report Share Posted October 24, 2016 'this letter write by jtir mom' ? OT: man literally blamed his toxicity on having no balls irl LMFAO im weak Quote Link to comment
jtir hunter Posted October 24, 2016 Report Share Posted October 24, 2016 23 hours ago, Yoobs said: Sorry for the loss of your balls its okay man guys please don't bully me im just trying to make a friends in rsps Quote Link to comment
Aiden Posted October 24, 2016 Report Share Posted October 24, 2016 sorry 'fo the loss. Quote Link to comment
fook u boy Posted October 24, 2016 Report Share Posted October 24, 2016 deep shit, wouldn't go into info like this of my life on the community but that's your call your life.. hope all well. Quote Link to comment
jtir hunter Posted October 24, 2016 Report Share Posted October 24, 2016 20 hours ago, fook u boy said: deep shit, wouldn't go into info like this of my life on the community but that's your call your life.. hope all well. thanks man Quote Link to comment
Bone Time Posted October 24, 2016 Report Share Posted October 24, 2016 you gotta roll up some kush boi your whole life will change 1 Quote Link to comment
mauloffro Posted October 24, 2016 Report Share Posted October 24, 2016 trump2016 Quote Link to comment
Tanker H Posted October 25, 2016 Report Share Posted October 25, 2016 Not to be rude but is this really legit??? Quote Link to comment
jtir hunter Posted October 25, 2016 Report Share Posted October 25, 2016 bummmmmmmmmmmmmmmp @Zoradz @gretar @legend Quote Link to comment
Bone Time Posted October 25, 2016 Report Share Posted October 25, 2016 stop bumping this shit no one gives a fuck about your testicless scrotum and how you are bullied irl. The fact that you even posted this on an RSPS forums just shows why you get bullied irl. Did you expect positive feedback from all the very nice people in the Roat Pkz community ?? lmao 1 Quote Link to comment
jtir hunter Posted October 26, 2016 Report Share Posted October 26, 2016 On 10/25/2016 at 0:29 PM, Bone Time said: stop bumping this shit no one gives a fuck about your testicless scrotum and how you are bullied irl. The fact that you even posted this on an RSPS forums just shows why you get bullied irl. Did you expect positive feedback from all the very nice people in the Roat Pkz community ?? lmao no please dont speak like that Quote Link to comment
Looty Posted October 27, 2016 Report Share Posted October 27, 2016 Hiya, Idk you personally, but this took COURAGE. I am a girl, I get bullied and teased on this site for it, i rly dont mind, plz be above all this shit-chatter. If you're at all serious. I'm very happy for you, you might not have testicles but you have balls. & all these people flamming you... I would comment on but I cant be biased bc idk what you have said to them. WITH THAT SAID! Those of which laugh, "lol" at your situation spend their lives on the net emptying their sac's to pictures/cardboard cut-outs of, Ariana Grande, they have low self esteem and will be phased by these words bc they know its true, probably do them some good self-reflection tho. Best Wishes. #AlwaysHere2Talk #Xoxo V 1 Quote Link to comment
Zoradz Posted October 27, 2016 Report Share Posted October 27, 2016 6 hours ago, Looty said: Hiya, Idk you personally, but this took COURAGE. I am a male, I get bullied and teased on this site for it, i rly dont mind, plz be above all this shit-chatter. If you're at all serious. Didn't see that coming. 1 Quote Link to comment
Tom Posted October 27, 2016 Report Share Posted October 27, 2016 6 hours ago, Looty said: cardboard cut-outs of, Ariana Grande, what u sayin fam? @Gretar Quote Link to comment
jtir hunter Posted October 27, 2016 Report Share Posted October 27, 2016 22 hours ago, Tom said: what u sayin fam? @Gretar hello tom Quote Link to comment
Looty Posted October 27, 2016 Report Share Posted October 27, 2016 I've now come to understand why nobody likes you, you're desperate for attention. Quote Link to comment
custamcustom Posted October 28, 2016 Report Share Posted October 28, 2016 On 10/27/2016 at 6:52 AM, Tom said: what u sayin fam? @Gretar PM ME IN GAME TOM ITS INSOYISGAY title of this thread should be "reasons to kill my self in real life" faggot do it On 10/24/2016 at 1:33 AM, jtir hunter said: its okay man guys please don't bully me im just trying to make a friends in rsps yeah but in game u acting hard stfu On 10/23/2016 at 7:05 PM, Reducers said: when your shitty clan falls apart don't come crawling to me Quote Link to comment
Estimated Posted November 2, 2016 Report Share Posted November 2, 2016 22 minutes ago, J J said: People believe this is true Nobody asked for your opinion bish Quote Link to comment
Graphics Posted November 2, 2016 Report Share Posted November 2, 2016 you are one of the reasons why this server is cancerous, and to make up a story to have people feel bad for you is just plain autism. Quote Link to comment
Graphics Posted November 2, 2016 Report Share Posted November 2, 2016 Just now, J J said: Mod loc at-least I made it to server support, and mod? and not (hidden mod) 1 Quote Link to comment
Graphics Posted November 3, 2016 Report Share Posted November 3, 2016 15 hours ago, J J said: I'm asking why aren't you mod yet again i probably could be, if i grinded hours on roatz but i choose not to. sorry for the shots lol. 1 Quote Link to comment
she rags Posted November 3, 2016 Report Share Posted November 3, 2016 pathetic, is this an exucse so that every1 on roatz is gonna like you? #loccc? #wego200hours 1 Quote Link to comment
Steve Jobs Posted November 6, 2016 Report Share Posted November 6, 2016 You wrote this october 23rd. I don't see what the reason was behind making a big topic like this when you, yet to this day, flame like a squealing pig. And regarding your toxic-addictive obsession I only have one tip for you; namenly quit. That'd help our cancerous community alittle, and you'd go on rehab. Good luck with your fake struggles and I hope you recieve a reality check as that's what you need now. Quote Link to comment
dark man dk Posted March 28, 2017 Report Share Posted March 28, 2017 Cute af lmfao btw im better than u tribridding Quote Link to comment
Thijssssssss Posted March 28, 2017 Report Share Posted March 28, 2017 Can I have a signature Seek? Quote Link to comment
Castial Posted March 28, 2017 Report Share Posted March 28, 2017 (edited) Mate, this is roatpkz you've got like 4 options. Play the game yourself, join the SQUAD join the other squad, or make a squad of yourself. If you play long enough you'll know exactly what the fuck I mean that in-itself cures your depression. Now for my final piece of advice, niggas on here are ruthless we all are, to survive you need to be at a minimum level of no fucks. If per say @Yoobscame to your apartment irl to shank you, don't take it personal it'll never happen but hypothetically you'd earn more respect by him and everyone else by planning his assassination. The only things we respect are new levels of toxic behavior, if you raise the bar you are a legend for like 15 minutes until someone breaks your score then we tell you to go fuck yourself. It's like a tough love on the roatpkz dickterscale. Edited March 28, 2017 by Castial Quote Link to comment
Ungrateful Posted March 28, 2017 Report Share Posted March 28, 2017 On 10/26/2016 at 11:01 PM, Looty said: Hiya, Idk you personally, but this took COURAGE. I am a girl, I get bullied and teased on this site for it, i rly dont mind, plz be above all this shit-chatter. If you're at all serious. I'm very happy for you, you might not have testicles but you have balls. & all these people flamming you... I would comment on but I cant be biased bc idk what you have said to them. WITH THAT SAID! Those of which laugh, "lol" at your situation spend their lives on the net emptying their sac's to pictures/cardboard cut-outs of, Ariana Grande, they have low self esteem and will be phased by these words bc they know its true, probably do them some good self-reflection tho. Best Wishes. #AlwaysHere2Talk #Xoxo V Hey my queen Vanessa hhhh Quote Link to comment
catlover911 Posted March 28, 2017 Report Share Posted March 28, 2017 53 minutes ago, Castial said: Mate, this is roatpkz you've got like 4 options. Play the game yourself, join the SQUAD join the other squad, or make a squad of yourself. If you play long enough you'll know exactly what the fuck I mean that in-itself cures your depression. Now for my final piece of advice, niggas on here are ruthless we all are, to survive you need to be at a minimum level of no fucks. If per say @Yoobscame to your apartment irl to shank you, don't take it personal it'll never happen but hypothetically you'd earn more respect by him and everyone else by planning his assassination. The only things we respect are new levels of toxic behavior, if you raise the bar you are a legend for like 15 minutes until someone breaks your score then we tell you to go fuck yourself. It's like a tough love on the roatpkz dickterscale. You also need help irl oh my god Quote Link to comment
Persona Posted March 28, 2017 Report Share Posted March 28, 2017 15 minutes ago, catlover911 said: You also need help irl oh my god Why u bumping this post its older than my nan Quote Link to comment
Castial Posted March 28, 2017 Report Share Posted March 28, 2017 1 hour ago, catlover911 said: You also need help irl oh my god Quote Link to comment
Kihfan55 Posted March 28, 2017 Report Share Posted March 28, 2017 @raja kredre @voting santa @viva madrid @Bride Chucky @Taylor @giedriusman @desert ship @amireleid1 @Love wings 2 Quote Link to comment
ReDe$igned Posted March 29, 2017 Report Share Posted March 29, 2017 (edited) You left school at 14 because you were getting bullied while all you had to do was communicate with the school staff,you're just as worse as those mentally retarded idiots who commit suicide because they were being bullied.I mean you were 14 and you were already finding life hard while life hadn't even hit you yet L0L.You will probably commit suicide once you start living on your own.Idk why people even feel sorry for idiots like these lmao Edited March 29, 2017 by ReDe$igned Quote Link to comment
goku ssj Posted April 22, 2019 Report Share Posted April 22, 2019 guys i just grow a 3 pair of balls Quote Link to comment
Hyb My Ass Posted February 13, 2020 Report Share Posted February 13, 2020 On 4/22/2019 at 11:23 AM, goku ssj said: guys i just grow a 3 pair of balls Big man Quote Link to comment
Hatcx Posted August 25, 2020 Report Share Posted August 25, 2020 (edited) On 10/27/2016 at 12:01 PM, Looty said: Hiya, Idk you personally, but this took COURAGE. I am a girl, I get bullied and teased on this site for it, i rly dont mind, plz be above all this shit-chatter. If you're at all serious. I'm very happy for you, you might not have testicles but you have balls. & all these people flamming you... I would comment on but I cant be biased bc idk what you have said to them. WITH THAT SAID! Those of which laugh, "lol" at your situation spend their lives on the net emptying their sac's to pictures/cardboard cut-outs of, Ariana Grande, they have low self esteem and will be phased by these words bc they know its true, probably do them some good self-reflection tho. Best Wishes. #AlwaysHere2Talk #Xoxo V LOOOOL TRANNY THIS GUY STILL HAS NO BALLS L0000000000000000000000000000000000L Edited August 25, 2020 by Hatcx Quote Link to comment
Speedsmasher Posted August 25, 2020 Report Share Posted August 25, 2020 LOOOOOL Quote Link to comment
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